


It Took Some Time, But I'm Home For Good

by miocean



Category: Day6 (Band)
Genre: Fluff, Getting Back Together, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Weddings, just added some things, posted it before but i delete it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-11
Updated: 2018-11-11
Packaged: 2019-08-22 01:24:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,176
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16588088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miocean/pseuds/miocean
Summary: Jae walks into the restaurant, anxious on seeing the love of his best friend's life and the best friend himself. Wonpil had excitedly appointed him as his best man and he can't say no to those eyes. What he expects, an exhaustingly long process of wedding planning. What he do not expect, seeing his ex again after four years, sitting on the same table as Wonpil.Or simply, a wedding plus ex-lovers getting back together au.





	It Took Some Time, But I'm Home For Good

**Author's Note:**

> i posted this before, and somehow i deleted it. nothing much changes, just added some additional parts to clear up some confusion in the story--i hope it does. hope you will like it.  
> Thank you to my friend who gave me the much needed words of encouragement. If you're reading this, hi. Yes, it's me XD
> 
> Quotes are from Laozi, Mignon McLaughlin, Elizabeth Barrett Browning, Edgar Allan Poe and Pablo Neruda.

_We loved with a love that was more than love – Edgar Allan Poe_

 

He should have never agreed to be Wonpil's best man—that is the first thought on his mind as Jae steps inside the restaurant. Jae sighs—it does not even matter if Wonpil has been there for him since diapers, or if Kim Wonpil is his best friend, or even if in their best friend code has this one rule that said that one should always do the favour to the other.

 

Jae looks at the man who is sitting beside him, using his peripheral view before he catches the man, who appears to also have been staring at him. No surprise there though. Jae thinks as he takes a gulp of water from his glass, easing the tight knot in his stomach before he stares at the loving couple sitting in front of him. They are sitting on the opposite side of the table, and he could still feel a gaze burning into him. And, for the nth time—Jae lost count—he drinks again, rendering the glass empty and they have not even started yet.

 

This is awkward. How will he survive this, Jae takes a deep breath.

 

"Jae, this is Sungjin, my fiancé," Jae gives the man a look—he was sporting a nice, clean and short cut, maybe from a buzz cut that the hair has been given a chance to grow, Jae notes. He also got a nice pair of irises, that piercing into the depth of your soul kind of eyes, as Jae studies the man sitting beside Wonpil. He smiles, not fully meaning it because he felt awkward, with the whole situation right now. "Sungjin, this is Jae, my best man and also, unfortunately, my best friend," Wonpil beams as he looks at Jae, introducing him to his husband-to-be.

 

"Jae," he nods at Sungjin, not before adding. "If you want any extra details about Piri, I'm the man," he winks, in hope to ease that awkward feeling creeping in his body. Sungjin laughs as Wonpil throws Jae a dirty look.

 

"Nice to be finally meeting you in person, Jae—but I think I know enough," Sungjin said, receiving a scoff from Jae. Wonpil gives him a look—Jae knows that look. He is threatening him that if he gives Sungjin any ideas there will be a price to pay. Well, let’s just say the thing isn’t going to end well. Here's the thing, growing up with Wonpil and being friends with him for almost the entire time of their lifetime, Jae knows that despite coming off as an innocent, won't hurt a fly kind of child, Wonpil is scarily dangerous if you push enough buttons. Not that he is afraid of Wonpil though, Jae smirks.

 

"And Brian, this is—" "Jae."

 

Jae interrupts Wonpil as he quickly holds out his hand toward Brian, initiating the handshake before Brian could evoke any sign or indication that they knew each other. Jae could see Brian raising his brow, confusion masking his face for a millisecond but nonetheless, the latter decides to shrug it off and plays along with Jae—for now.

 

Yes, he and Brian used to have something. Keyword: used.

 

"Brian," his grip is firm and strong, as he remembers and Jae could not help but indulges in Brian's touch. They always seem to conjure a sense of security and comfort within him. He still remembers the shape of his hand, its roughness, the way it perfectly fits him. Still. Their handshake remains for a bit too long. Wonpil witnesses the whole exchange between them, snickering under his breath. He is happy to know that his plan on setting the two up might be successful after all. Sungjin just looks at his fiancé, hoping that Wonpil won't force his idea on the two too hard. As much as he wanted Brian to find someone, especially after that horrible breakup, he had during university—and Jae, as he studies the guy, seems like a nice person and he seems a lot like Brian's type. He might just be what Brian needs now.

 

A waitress interrupts the quartet, informing something to the couple, before escorting them somewhere else, leaving only Brian and Jae at the table. Not before Wonpil says "play nice" to Jae. Suddenly he feels thirsty, before noticing that he had already emptied his glass earlier. He then calls for the waiter, asking for a refill. He thanks the waiter as he walks away from them. None of them are speaking and Jae prays to the god, hoping that he won't have to speak or even interact with the man beside him till the end.

 

"So—" shit, Jae cursed, not meaning to say it out loud and then he hears the man beside him laugh. "—how are you?" their eyes meet each other, and Brian gives him a slight smile. They both know how absurd and awkward the whole thing is—meeting your ex again and it isn’t what you can call an amicable separation.

 

"Honestly," Jae purses his lips, telling himself to calm down over and over. Sure, it was a bad breakup. Sure, it never occurs in his mind to even think about seeing Brian again. Sure, Brian gave the heartache to last him for a time without an end. But, he sighs, it had been four years since then. Both of them are nearing their big three and they supposed to be a mature and sensible adult—who could put any bad past behind them. Jae stares at Brian, noting how the man gives him occasional awkward smiles, a thing he does when he is nervous. Jae smiles at the memory before saying, "I've been good. You?"

 

Brian nods. "Same old. A bit surprised, I might add," he grins, a sincere grin with the twinkle in his eyes, Jae notes.

 

"Does Sungjin know?" Brian shakes his head, mouthing no. "Wonpil doesn't know as well."

 

"I figured that much," Brian toys with the napkins on the table, eyes refusing to meet Jae.

 

"I really don't expect to see you again," Jae said the obvious truth, watching Brian hums and nodding slightly.

 

"Jae—" he sees Brian furrowing his eyebrows, eyes in deep focus and Jae knows whatever he wants to say, it means that it is serious and he had thought about it deeply, carefully before voicing it out. Brain looks at him and Jae feels like they are back again, as undergraduate, naïve and mostly in love. He feels like he is seeing those eyes that he loves so much for the first time yet again.

 

"Yeah," he mutters softly, audible to only his and Brian's ear. To Jae's surprise, Brian smile at him, that confident and sexy smile of his. In that minuscule moment, he feels his heart skips erratically at the sight.

 

"Are we going to act like the generic ex?" he jokes, leaning closer to him. Jae stares at Brian, thinking of all the possibilities, thinking about how all of this could go wrong.

 

"We're mature adults." "Yes, we are."

 

Jae rolls his eyes at Brian as the latter laugh softly at him—he remembers how annoying Brian could be sometimes.

 

"As I was saying," he looks at Brian, leaning closer but still maintaining a good distance between them. "We are friends before we were in a relationship," he drawls, fidgeting with his fingers.

 

"So—" Brain carefully adds, watching the other intently. Did Jae see something akin to hope in his eyes?

 

"So—friends?" Jae gives him a timid smile before exhaling in relief as he sees Brian expression mirroring his own—his smile is soft and sweet. 

 

"Friends," Brian said and Jae smiles even wider, feeling better all of a sudden. Then both of them hear the couple approaching them, smiling and laughing together, the love between them clear.

 

"Should we tell them?" Brian chuckles, noting the couple from the corner of his eyes as they gradually come closer.

 

Jae glances at Wonpil and Sungjin as he purses his lips, thinking about the best possible outcome. "Nah. Where's the fun in that?" he decides before smiling at the couple when they come back to their table.

 

"Hey you two, they are going to bring the food soon," Sungjin said, pulling the chair for Wonpil before sitting down beside him.

 

"Hmm, can't wait. I'm starving," Brian adds.

 

"You're always hungry, Brian," Jae laughs, shaking his head. Brian retorts, smiling at Jae, both of them oblivious to the two pairs of eyes watching them.

 

"Oh?" Wonpil raises his brow, looking at them suspiciously. "Did you two already know each other before?" he pointed his finger at the two, leaning closer to the table before looking at Sungjin, asking whether he knows about the two. Sungjin shrugs and he looks at Brian, noticing that meaningful smile from him.

 

"He is fun," Jae said.

 

"It's like we have known each other for years—" Brian said, Jae, looking at him, excited to see how is Brian going to arrange his words, while still smiling softly at him, "—although we've only met today," he chuckles.

 

Wonpil rolls his eyes but smiling nonetheless. He is happy to see that both Brian and Jae click so well with each other. Sungjin squeezes his fiancé hands, before leading them back to focus as the food arrives.

 

"Please don't hold back on the criticism," Sungjin adds while the waiter plating their food on their table. Wonpil is about to comment on that before Brian laughs, shifting their focus on the said man.

 

"Don't worry Sungjin, trust me, he won't," Brian smirks, pointing his fork at Jae earning a sort of faux betrayal gasps from the latter follows by a gentle shove from Jae. Sungjin smells something fishy on their table, and none of them ordered seafood.

 

<<<>>> 

 

"So, why do we have to be here again?" Jae asks, sitting on the couch beside Brian. His eyes follow the two women in front of him, both Sungjin and Wonpil sister's look at Jae like he had asked them the stupidest question ever.

 

"We need you for the fitting, duh," Sungjin's sister, Seunghee, told him like it was the most obvious thing in the room. "You don't expect me to wear it do you?" she said with a deadpan expression.

 

"But noona—" he pointed his finger at Brian and himself, "—we aren't the one getting married."

 

"We know that doofus," this time, Wonpil's sister, Wonhee, rolls her eyes as she walks to stand beside Seunghee. "We are going to pick some tux later, and you two will try it on," she gives the two of them a once over.

 

"Why didn't you just bring Piri and Sungjin today?" Seunghee groans at Jae, shutting the man up. "Geez sorry for asking," Jae pouts as he leans back into the sofa, the action sending him closer to Brian—shoulders touching. Jae could feel its warmth seeping through.

 

"You'll be Piri," Wonhee looks at Jae before shifting to Brian and smiling. "And you, Sungjin."

 

"Do we have to act like the happy couple as well?" Jae laughs before doing the kissy sounds at Brian in which Brian responses by suddenly closing the distance between their face. The feat makes Jae halts, his eyes not leaving Brian's—that two dark, incandescent pools that he loves so much. Time ceased to exist for Jae, as everything seems to move painstaking slow for him. It is like those cheesy moments depicted in the movie when you first saw your significant other, and then suddenly world stops.

 

Seunghee coughs deliberately, breaking the two apart.

 

"We'll go find something, you two can continue with whatever that was," both sisters smirks at them before walking out from the room, following the consultant to look at the collection.

 

"Sorry," Brian rubs the back of his neck as he clears his throat before speaking. His voice laced with a hint of embarrassment, but he did not sound sorry at all in Jae opinion.

 

"Nah, I'm the one who started it," Jae laughs, shrugging it all off—the lingering feeling, that skip in his heart and just everything. He looks at Brian as he smiles softly. "I miss you," he said quietly, under his breath.

 

Brian's eyes widen, shocked. The admission from Jae almost disappears into the thin air if not for Brian leaning close to Jae, permitting his ear to catch what he was saying. He studies Jae, looking for any fraction of anything—hope, longing or anything—he hopes to catch but there's only Jae smiling at him, telling him that he misses him and Brian could not help himself as he takes Jae's right hand. His eyes staying there, and he marvels at the expanse of soft milky white skin, his long slender fingers—holding it in his and using his thumb as he rubs a circle on Jae's palm. "I miss you too," he said softly, meeting Jae's eyes, his eyes a crescent.

 

Brian wants to ask more, he wants to confirm something but before he could utter a single word, the two sisters barge into the room, with numerous pair of tux in tow.

 

"We got them, so who's going first?" Wonhee says as she stares at the both of them, noticing the air between the two. She raises her brow, about says something but Jae quickly stands up, offering to try those tuxes first, bringing Wonhee along with him.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Brian enters the bar, spotting Dowoon and Jaebum sitting at the usual spot.

 

“Brian,” Jaebum raises his right hand, while Dowoon—who had his back on him—turns around to greet him with a grin. Brian walks to them, before settling on a seat beside Dowoon. He lightly taps Dowoon shoulder before nodding at Jaebum.

 

“Where’s Sungjin?” he asks, looking around the bar. Jaebum signals the bartender, before turning at Brian.

 

“He’s running late, said something about emergency patient,” Jaebum shrugs. The bartender approaches them, as he helps the trio with their drinks before leaving.

 

“So, I heard something interesting happened last week?” Dowoon sips his drink, as he insouciantly utters the question to Brian.

 

“Define interesting,” Brian laughs, playing indifferently with the younger although he knows what is he insinuating. Dowoon rolls his eyes, before throwing a monotonous look at him.

 

“Park Jaehyung,” he says, smirking while Jaebum having a fit of laughter behind him. “Or—” he drawls, “—Jae Park, Jaehyungie hyung, Jae hyung. Which do you prefer?”

 

Brian could definitely see that mischievous twinkle in his eyes. He takes another sip of his drink before sighing loudly. “Fine,” he gives up after seeing the two expectant looks from his two friends. “Jae is Sungjin’s fiancé’s best friend.”

 

Dowoon whistles, leaning back on his stool. “What a small world.”

 

“Indeed,” Jaebum nods, agreeing with the younger. He leans forward, tilting his head to look at Brian, “how is he?”

 

Brian looks at him, staring as he purses his lips, thinking about how to word his answer. “He’s—fine I guess?”

 

“You guess?” Dowoon raises an inquisitive eyebrow.

 

“We’re friends again.”

 

“Friends?” Jaebum asks incredulously, repeating his question again when Brian only nods in agreement. Dowoon laughs suddenly—he is loud—catching Brian attention. He gives the younger a look saying ‘what’s so funny about it?’ and waits till Dowoon catches his breath.

 

“I don’t see what’s so amusing about Jae and me being friends.”

 

“Of course, you don’t. You oblivious fool,” Jaebum says.

 

“Hey!” Brian protests.

 

“It’s funny that Sungjin and Wonpil doesn’t know about you two. Considering the best friends status,” Jaebum mentions, looking at Brian.

 

“I never did directly told Sungjin about Jae, and Jae told me at that time Wonpil was studying aboard, busy with his recitals and piano practice. So, he didn’t mention it and besides we only dated briefly,” Brian shrugs.

 

“Yeah, you and Jae were busy wasting time pining for each other for three whole years,” Dowoon snickers. Jaebum and Dowoon laugh.

 

“Can I say something?” Dowoon asks, eyeing Brian carefully and he knows that expression—when Dowoon starts to be polite, it’s a code for ‘can I throw shit at your face and offend you with your permission?’ Brian narrowed his eyes, but still giving the younger the go-ahead.

 

“Do your worst, Dowoonie,” he sneers.

 

“You and Jae can never be just friends,” Brian cocks his eyebrow, urging the younger to continue. “Because, my dear Brian, don’t tell me you didn’t see it or feel it okay. You two will forever have that kind of something going on, that heavy tension, that lure that you can’t ever deny.”

 

Brian holds his tongue—taking in the younger’s words.

 

“And that’s why you two can never be just friends,” Dowoon concludes, feeling proud of himself.

 

“Yeah, I mean, you guys had this whole tension going on since our freshman year. It was prodigiously torturing to be around you two,” Jaebum adds.

 

Brian sighs, thinking about their words. Thinking about the truth in them as he remembers when they unconsciously flirted with each other. How easy it is to slip back to that comfortable, easy banter between them—like they’re still together. He groans as the realisation hits him—hard in the face—his head slumps over the bar counter.

 

“This is bad. So, so bad.” 

 

Jaebum and Dowoon just stare at him, before sighing. Dowoon pats his back as a means to comfort him.

 

“What’re you going to do?” Jaebum asks.

 

Brian turns his head, still slumps over the counter. He looks at the two—his eyes look defeated—first Jaebum then Dowoon, before sighing loudly.

 

“Honestly, I don’t know.”

 

“Brian,” Jaebum bites his lips. “Not to get your hopes up or anything,” Brian stares at him, intently, “but I think, if he’s still the old Jae, that feeling might still be there.”

 

“What do you mean?” “Hey, guys sorry I’m late.”

 

All three heads turn to the voice and they see Sungjin as he navigates through the crowd. Brian looks back at the two—Jaebum and Dowoon—silently asking them to keep quiet about the whole thing, pleading them. Jaebum and Dowoon look at each other, as they come to an agreement, adhering with Brian’s request.

 

Sungjin wraps his hands around Brian’s shoulder, staring at them. “What did I miss?” he grins as he sits on the vacant seat beside Brian.

 

Brian smiles, as he silently thanking the other two for keeping still. He asks Sungjin about his works and wedding plans, steering the earlier conversation away from the attention. The night passes by, peaceful and mostly with the quartet catching up with each other lives. And also, a lot of congratulation and teasing directed to the nervous groom.

 

<<<>>> 

 

"Wow this place is beautiful," Wonpil wonders in awe, hands intertwining with Sungjin as they walk along the garden, the place where it will soon witness Wonpil and Sungjin as they profess their undying love for each other, marking it with perpetuity.

 

Jae has been watching the whole exchange from behind, with Brian at his side. Both of them still can't quite believe that their best friends have been dating each other and soon going to be married. It is surprising—still, to know that his best friend for 28 years has finally found someone that he wants to spend the rest of his life with. Jae knows Wonpil, although he may come out as an easy and outgoing person, he knows that Wonpil will never instigate something if he was not fully committed to it. So when he heard about Sungjin, Jae never thought that it will become like this. He was thankful to know that somehow Sungjin managed to find his way to Wonpil's heart. Jae looks at the couple, as laughter rings in the air, and both Sungjin and Wonpil are staring at each other, adoration evident in their eyes.

 

"Cute, aren't they?" Brian asks, breaking Jae out from his thoughts. Then, Jae turns his head slightly to look at him.

 

"The cutest," Jae smiles.

 

"I can't believe our best friend is actually marrying each other," Jae nods in agreement with Brian. "They didn't even tell us they are dating. I just got a call," Brian holds up his right hand, mimicking the telephone and says, “Brian, you got to be my best man.”

 

Jae laughs, holding Brian gaze on him. "Maybe this is a best friend kinda thing? Between us? To be honest, we also didn't tell them about us," Jae motions the both of them. "We kinda dated each other before."

 

“Kinda?” Brian snorts as he directs Jae towards the bench—which looks suspiciously small, Jae thinks—overlooking the whole garden. They sit on the bench managed to occupy both of them. "May I remind you, whose idea it was?"

 

Jae nudges him lightly as they chuckle, before settling for silence. "Wonpil been asking—" he paused, blinking his eyes, in which Brian always found adorable. Brian instinctively pinches Jae's cheek.

 

"Briaaann," Jae whines.

 

"Sorry—urgh, habits," Brian smiles sheepishly, withdrawing his hand and putting it on his side. Jae suddenly remembers when they were together, Brian does have a peculiar fondness for his cheeks, in which resulted in the cheek abuse. A smile appears on his face, as he looks at Brian fondly. His mind suddenly goes blank at the sight of Brian at the moment, as the winds blowing softly and his hair moving along with it, sending a cascade of feelings in Jae.

 

Jae froze in silence.

 

“You were—” “Brian!"

 

Sungjin yells from the far end of the garden, interrupting them. Jae doesn’t want to know if he was grateful or not at the disturbance. Sungjin then motions Brian to come over, further ending anything that Jae wanted to say, or—he shudders as he realises on what he was about to do. What he about to admit. He is thankful that Sungjin, somehow, for stopping him from doing things that he would had regretted.

 

"Let see what our grooms wants shall we?" Brian stands up, with his right-hand stretches out, for Jae to take. Jae looks at Brian, contemplating for a while before smiling and stands up. He walks ahead, leaving Brian at loss.

 

Jae pushes those thoughts away—for now.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Brian made it to his apartment, after an hour flight journey. These whole best man deals are tiring and it is taking a toll on him. He thinks about the bachelor party that he had yet to finalise and getting the rest of Sungjin's groomsmen to confirm their attendance. He groans thinking of those kinds of stuff. He is thankful that at least Dowoon is proactive in helping him organising and arranging the party. His thoughts stray to that one person that had been occupying his mind for a good few months. He thinks about Jae, about Wonpil's party and where is he going to go, how many guys are going and stuff—what is Jae doing now.

 

He lays face down on his bed, feeling the soft duvet with his fingertips and he sighs. He enjoys the soft feeling under his skin and lets his body goes lax, feeling the tension slips away. He thinks about Jae when they were trying the wedding tux and he thinks about how ethereal Jae looks in that white tux, how surreal he looks. Those eyes of his that looked back at him, and then Jae was smiling at him. How much after that he visions Jae, walking down the altar, with him waiting at the end.

 

Brian groans as he turns around, facing the ceiling. The sun is setting, flares of sun's rays filtering through the curtain, and a set of brilliant oranges and reds painted on the ceiling. It reminds Brian the time during their university days, where they will just lay down on the floor, watching the room turns orange and enjoying each other company. He remembers, his sweet and beautiful Jae—the sun conquering smile Jae.

 

He knew, from the moment he laid eyes on Jae, during the freshmen orientation, this tall lanky man—an incarnate of an angel—that he can't escape from him. He remembers how easy it was to fall for him. How easy it is, still. He remembers being attracted to the man, so much that he didn't mind going to the 8AM class just to catch Jae before his class—Jae’s class being the next one after his. And when they made it official, he was so happy it was overwhelming.

 

But then, things got to them. It was stupid—really—he smiles sadly, at how they break up. It was because of something trivial that he can't seem to remember why. Maybe it was because their relationship was still new and budding, and Brian was, as to quote his friends, the guy everyone wants to be with (not that Brian thinks himself as one). Being friends was easy, you didn't have any set of restrictions and boundaries, and feeling and hearts weren't involved. Jae didn't mind with the constant attention he attracted from other people during the course of their friendship and perhaps Brian had been naive to think that nothing will change after they change the status in their relationship—when you and I become mine and us.

 

He thought that Jae knew that he only had him in his heart and mind. He knows Jae trusted him. But, he guess, they were too young, too much hormone and pride involved in the relationship. They were both tired and stressed out, with them both being in their final year in university—the stress, the workload, the thesis, and everything took a toll on them, both mentally and physically. Brian remembers that big fight they had just a few weeks before Jae's defence, the one that had led them to that. A few days before Brian had taken Jae to a party—one of his friends told him about—for him to loosen up. Brian sighs as he guesses something must have happened at the party that the cool-headed Jae, the laid back man he knew was suddenly bursting to his tears in his room on a Sunday morning.

 

"I can't do this anymore, Bri." He remembers how broken Jae sounded, how defeated he was and they were young—driven with ego and pride and Brian was hurt that Jae didn't trust him enough. Their fight ended up with them shouting at each other, insults exchanged and Jaebum—his roommate—ended up taking Jae away, and they never saw each other since that day. He spends each day regretting his action, always asking why he didn't go after him, why he didn't put his pride aside for Jae and that had plagued Brian for a long time. It had taken Brian a considerably a long time to put it all behind and move past it. That is until that day he stepped into the restaurant, and he saw Jae, his beautiful and all sunshine Jae.

 

He decides that he never wants to let go of him again. He snaps out from his thoughts when his smartphone rings. He sighs and waits for a few moments before snatching the device he placed at the bedside table earlier.

 

He smiles when he sees the name flash on the screen.

 

Jae.

 

"Yeah?" he said after accepting the call, hearing the melodious laughter over the call.

 

"I'm not disturbing you, am I?"

 

"Nah," Brian lies back down on his bed, smiling at the thought of Jae, he could imagine his cheeky smile drawn across his face. "I'm just—relaxing."

 

Jae hums in reply.

 

"So, what's up?" Brian asked, his voice sounds a bit too cheery. "I don't remember we're having any wedding appointment we to attend in the nearest time? Please tell me we don't, I just finish one just now."

 

"God, no," Jae laughs, Brian could imagine his soft eyes, the way they crinkle when he laughs, the slight shake of his head. "Perhaps, I just wanted to hear your voice?" it was cute hearing Jae drawl at the last words, making it sounds like a question.

 

"Jae—" Brian takes a deep breath, unsure on what to say while calming his erratic heartbeat.

 

"Or perhaps, we should go out for dinner," he hears laughter again over the line. "I'm hungry, Brian," Jae whines, erupting laughter from Brian. He could picture the pout forming on Jae's mouth.

 

"I just got back from Sungjin's, Jae."

 

"Then, should I come over? I can cook for us," he sounds overly excited over the phone and Brian purses his lips, thinking about things that could go wrong. But again, thinking about things involving Jae always make his brain stop working, and before he could stop himself, Brian agreed to Jae's plan and he finds himself smiling at the thought of Jae in his home.

 

"I'll send you the address,"

 

"Okay. See you, Bribri," the call ends and Brian still has his phone hanging on his ear, smiling at the sudden but welcome intrusion. And suddenly, he doesn't feel so tired, none at all. Brian smiles as he sits up and looks around his room. "Ahh!" he stands up quickly. "I have to clean up. Yes, and text Jae the address."

 

Brian quickly sends his address to Jae before he walks out from his room in hurry—stubbing his toe at the door in the process. Still, the throbbing pain is soon ignored with the thought of Jae coming to his place. Brian chuckles at the image of Jae in his apartment. His apartment. He gasps, remembering the state of his abode. Not exactly guest welcoming, especially not for this particular guest.

 

"Ah, yes. Yes. Clean."

 

<<<>>> 

 

"Brian, are you okay?" Jae does a once-over at the man standing in front of him. Brian is out of breath like he did a marathon before he arrives. Brian just smiles at him and ushers him inside, taking the bag of groceries from him, setting it at the island.

 

"You want a drink?" Brian offers, looking at Jae who is busy looking around his place.

 

"Water would be nice."

 

Brian hands him a glass of water before leading Jae to seat on the couch, sitting side-by-side. Jae takes a sip. "Your place looks clean," he said, looking impressed. “The Brian I know, his place is really—” Jae grins cheekily, “—I can’t even see the floor. Thank god for Jaebum.”

 

"Ah, you know. That Brian has changed,” he paused, mirroring Jae’s expression. “Mature and responsible adult now,” both of them laugh at Brian silly and horrible attempts at explanation.

 

"Is that why you look so out of breath?" Jae teased, cocking an eyebrow at Brian.

 

"Ah, exposed," he holds up both his hand in the air, grinning at Jae.

 

"Well, what mature adult you are," they both laugh again before settling into silence. Jae fidgets with his fingers, eyes looking everywhere but Brian. He doesn't know why suddenly he offered to cook for Brian or the sudden burst of courage. "Suppose," Jae said. "I'm going to cook for you now."

 

"Ahh, yeah sure," Brian laughs awkwardly. "Do you need help?"

 

"Do you want to help?" Jae asks.

 

"If you want me."

 

Jae laughs and he got up without giving Brian an answer. He walks to the kitchen and starts organising the stuff he bought earlier on the island. Brian watches him from his seat, enjoying the view in front of him—the domesticity of it.

 

"Aren't you gonna help me?" Jae said suddenly, eyes focusing on the groceries. Brian smiles as he quickly walks to Jae, giving him a helping hand.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Brian smiles as he waves Jae goodbye using his arms and hands. Jae smiles as he waves his hand back. The taxi is driving him further away from Brian’s place. Brian waits for a few more minutes after the yellow car disappears from his sights before going back into his apartment.

 

As he steps inside his apartment, he could still smell the lingering musky vanilla scent from Jae's perfume. He thinks about Jae and about what they just did today. He thinks about how good it felt to be with him, how good it feels, still. He stares at the kitchen, remembering the things he did with Jae today, cooking together, eating together—his whole evening laced with laughter and Jae. There was a lot of staring, stolen shy glances, accidental touches, and soft smiles. How easy it was for them to fall back together—to that easy, peaceful atmosphere between them, and he imagine if they are still together—how will their life be any different than that. Will the whole situation be in reverse—will he be the one who is getting married instead of Sungjin.

 

How easy it is to fall back in love.

 

He thinks about Jae and his smile, how much he wants it back in his life and how much he wants it to be his—only for his sight. Jae has made his presence permanent in his home, again. He is sure he couldn't erase Jae now, not when each corner and crook of this place reminds him of Jae. Not that he minded it. He smiles, thinking about how smooth it is for Jae to make a place for himself in his life over and over (not that he ever left in the first place, Brian realises). He chuckles, turning off the lights before retreating back into his bedroom.

 

His phone, where he left it on his bed earlier, lights up, as a new notification pops up. Brian picks up and smiles at the sight of Jae's name on it. He had sent him a text.

 

Brian opens the text from Jae.

 

Jae: I'm glad we got to do something together today. Good night, Bribri.

[One(1) image attached]

 

He smiles at the picture of Jae, lying on his bed smiling widely with his eyes closed. "Cute," he mutters, staring at the picture longer, tracing Jae's features with his fingers. After a good minute, Brian types a reply back to Jae.

 

Brian: Thanks for today. Night, Jaehyungie ;)

 

<<<>>> 

 

The lights peeking from the curtains hit his closed eyes. Jae groans as he turns away from the light, shifting to the edge of the bed. He waits for a few minutes before peering through his eyes, looking for his smartphone that he had left it on the nightstand last night. Still squinting, he checks the time before deciding to get up from the confine of his bed. Jae shifts, back pressing on the bed, as he stares at the ceiling, taking in the white of the ceiling in his sight.

 

He sighs as he remembers what he did last night, how bold he had become. He thinks about Brian, and his smiles, and the things that had transpired in Brian’s apartment. Unconsciously, a smile adorns his face, and he can't help but laughs at the absurdity of it. How brave of him to do things that only people with a specific type of relationship did. How foolish he had been and how lucky he is—lucky that Brian isn't like most people. They're not like your most likely pair who used to be in a relationship usually acts.

 

The words suddenly rings in his mind, from a friend from their past, who knows about their history together—his friend from university. "Do you still like him?" he asked him when Jae called him after he got home from the wedding’s venue visit. He had told him about Brian, and how he got roped into all of this during the call. As he listened to Jae attentively, he had asked Jae that question.

 

He thinks about that question all the time since that day, remembering the said question when he sees Brian's smile, his laughter and when Brian looks at him. He thinks about the possible meaning behind that gaze. He begins to think about the ‘what’s if’ situation.

 

Jae knows the answer to that question. In a heartbeat, he would gladly, happily answer 'yes', without any hesitation or resistance—but, only if he is still the Park Jaehyung, a PolSci undergrad.

 

He remembers about the conversation with Wonpil the day before he shamelessly invites himself to Brian's house—invading his kitchen.

 

 

_"I think it's no use to deny your feelings or your instinct. When you think it's the best thing to do at the moment. Then, do it," Wonpil said after thinking about it carefully. "It is better than regretting it afterward."_

_"How did you know?"_

_"Know what?" Wonpil looked at him like he had grown a second head. Jae rolled his eyes before clarifying his question earlier._

_"Sungjin's is the right one?"_

_Wonpil smiled. "I trusted my instinct and go for it."_

_"How could you be so sure?" Jae asked. He can’t help his tone of voice, resulting in him sounded very cynic about it._

_Wonpil laughs. "Jae, have you been listening?" he looked at Wonpil, confusion narrowing his expression. "Even if it was a bad decision or my instinct turned out wrong. I won't have any regrets, because at that time, I know that's the best thing to do or the right decision."_

_"You're annoyingly optimistic, Piri."_

_Wonpil laughed and they decided to end that conversation there, and they proceeded to talk about other stuff, more wedding stuffs, before separating on their own ways._

 

 

Jae, still lying on his bed starts to think that maybe, _just_ maybe, he should trust his instinct now.

 

<<<>>> 

 

"Okay, so do I look okay?" Sungjin asks, examining his tux at the mirror in the room, while Brian and Jae—who are sitting next to each other—watch him closely. He is worried about lots of things and Brian can't blame him. Any man would be when they're about to get married to the love of their life in less than a week.

 

"You look fine," he offers, but it seems he fails to find better adjectives to describe Sungjin's appearance now—as Sungjin give him an impassive stare. Jae laughs as he briefly skims his right hand over Brian's clothed thighs. Brian freezes at the contact as he observes Jae. The blond walks towards Sungjin, standing in front of the groom, with a good (but unsettling, Brian frowns) distance between them. Then his hands are smothering the lapels of Sungjin's tux, dusting off imaginary dust. He was smiling widely at the anxious groom and Brian can't help but imagine him being in Sungjin place.

 

He is really diving to the Challenger Deep for this man.

 

"Right, Bri?" he looks at Jae, confused because he didn't pay attention to their conversation, lost in his thoughts. Jae looks at him warmheartedly, shaking his head as he places his arms trough Sungjin’s. Brian stares at their linking arms and he feels a pang of jealousy. "What's in your mind, Bri?" he looks up.

 

"Ah, you look beautiful," he said while his eyes are locked on Jae's. There is an awkward silence as Sungjin shifts uncomfortably, mentally cursing himself for asking these two pinning idiots to accompany him earlier.

 

"No, you dummy,” Jae chuckles while pointing at Sungjin. “I mean Sungjin here,"

 

"Ah. Oh, ah I'm sorry," Brian smiles sheepishly, scratching the back of his ear. He clears his throat before speaking, facing Sungjin. With a monotone voice, he said, "you look adequate, thanks to the beautiful person standing next to you."

 

Jae laughs as Sungjin rubs his face in exasperation hearing Brian comment. Jae then assures Sungjin that he looks great and he is going to swap Wonpil off his feet. He seems convinced in Jae's words before doing a last check on the tux. He left the two alone with the consultant to take off his tux and finalising some details with the seamstress.

 

"Years apart and you still haven't changed," Jae goes back to sit beside Brian on the sofa, tilting his head slightly toward Brian, a mischievous smile playing on his lips. Brian takes a deep breath before smiling cockily at him.

 

"Only when I'm with you," he said.

 

"Oh, really?" Jae drawls, being daring, flirting openly with him. Brian leans in closer, impossibly closer and Jae do not mind. He encourages him further by closing the distance between them, and Brian could feel the soft hush of Jae's breath. And his scent—his scent is intoxicating him. That musky vanilla fragrance.

 

"You smell like vanilla," Brian blurts, erupting laughter from Jae. Brian decides that he likes seeing this kind of Jae up close, the way the light reflects on his eyes. The way his eyes forming a crescent, making the man look so cute that he wants to lather him with kisses.

 

"I do hope so because my Eau De Parfum said vanilla,” they laugh again.

 

"What do I smell like?" Brian smacks his head mentally thinking about the stupid question he just uttered. He can’t just control himself properly. Jae is taken aback by the sudden inquiry but he smiles as he places both of his hands on Brian's shoulders. Linking them together, trapping Brian around them.

 

"Why do you ask?" Jae answers a question with another question, eyes smiling playfully—arching an eyebrow as he somewhat provoking Brian, daring him—to be brave, to take a step forward. Brian holds his breath and waits, able to feel the tension in the air.

 

Jae leans impossibly closer, slowly—knowing that Brian is watching him. For Brian, each and passing moment is making him squirm, restless. It is torturing him. He feels a sudden rush of confidence, placing his hands around Jae’s waist. Brian feels Jae’s body tense for a second before relaxing into his touch. As Jae took a whip of Brian’s scent, Jae’s lips are dangerously close to his ear—Brian could feel the warmth, the huff of air as Jae opens his mouth.

 

“I think, strangely, I’m reminded of sandalwood and something citrusy, but—,” Jae huffs as he breathes in Brian’s scent. “—bergamot?”

 

“Are you a dog?” Brian asks, with that cheeky smile on his face causing Jae to roll his eyes.

 

“Why can’t you just tell me I got an impeccable sense of smell?” Jae snorts before they break into laughter. The heavy tension between them seems to dissipate.

 

“Ahhh—where’s the fun in that?” Jae snickers as he heard Brian before playfully pushing Brian away, returning to the safe distance. Sungjin returns before Brian could say anything more. Sungjin watches the pair, noting the air of playfulness around them, how they’re strangely comfortable with each other. He decides not to comment further because he doesn’t have the energy to do so. It’s not the time to pry, Sungjin thinks.

 

“So, I see you in a few days? For the bachelor party?” Sungjin asks Brian—who is seems surprised by the sudden query.

 

“Yeah. Dowoon did tell you all the details, right?”

 

“He did, just wanted to double confirm.” Sungjin shrugs, as Brian nods slightly at him. They exit the store and stands in front of Sungjin’s car.

 

“Is Wonpil having one?” Sungjin asks, turning to face Jae.

 

“Yeah, but it just something mild. You know Piri,” Jae awkwardly smiles, knowing for a fact at how wild Wonpil can be, but for the sake of his sanity, he remains mum. Sungjin snorts, as a result, Jae knows for sure that Sungjin didn’t buy it. But, thankfully Sungjin let it go for Jae’s sake. They said goodbye to Sungjin and the two of them walks to Brian’s car.

 

“Something mild, huh?” Brian asks, as soon as they settle in his car. He tilts his head, smirking at Jae who was laughing.

 

“Shut up.”

 

“Mild bachelor party, sure.”

 

“Brian Kang, I swear—“

 

“What?”

 

“Stupid.”

 

<<<>>> 

 

"Hey, Bri," he looks up from the text he'd been writing for the best man speech, looking at Sungjin who is sitting in his hotel's room, spending some time together before the party commences.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"I'm not trying to pry or anything," Sungjin sighs and Brian cocks his eyebrows, feeling that he knows where this is coming from. He watches Sungjin as he looks at him, determined. "What's going on between you and Jae?"

 

Brian thinks for a moment, deciding whether or not to tell Sungjin about his relationship with Jae and how should he explain it to Sungjin. He took a deep breath before saying, "we dated."

 

Shocked is an understatement for Sungjin. "What?" he yells eyes wide. "You and Jae—"

 

"Yeah," he grins sheepishly. "You remember my sun? From uni?"

 

"I do, but I don't see the—" Sungjin stops as something clicks in his mind. Then, he looks at Brian who is rubbing his neck. "Don't tell me Jae is your sun."

 

"Well—he is."

 

"Jae is the guy who wrecked you so bad that you can’t move on for almost a year?”

 

"That sounds about right."

 

Sungjin shakes his head in disbelief, collapsing on the sofa as he massages his temple. "What the fuck," he sighs in defeat.

 

"To my defence, I didn't know he is Wonpil's best friend."

 

"Of course you don't," he sighs. "Does Piri knows?"

 

Brian shakes his head, walks to sit beside Sungjin. "Sungjin."

 

"Piri gonna kill you both," Sungjin complaints while Brian laugh. "He has been trying to set you two together, that's why the whole unnecessary appointments and shit."

 

"Kinda figured that out," Brian chuckles. "We've also been meeting outside the wedding thing and all," he says carefully, observing Sungjin’s reaction. Sungjin sighs as he throws him a disbelief stare. Sunjin purses his lips, looking at Brian.

 

"I did warn you, Kang," he says after a while.

 

"I still want him, Sungjin," Brian confides. "After all these years, I am still in love with Jae."

 

"Do what you gotta do, man. Just don't ruin my wedding," Sungjin smile in defeat. "I'll convince Piri not to kill you later."

 

"Thanks, man."

 

<<<>>> 

 

_I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where – Pablo Neruda_

Jae walks around the garden, now decorated with beautiful flowers and an archway made up from woods and it is decorated with veins of greens and roses. The laces of pastels blue and whites flow freely, moving in accordance with the smooth breeze. The whole place is picturesque—with the beautiful, vast azure sea serving as the background. He pictures the beautiful scenery that will unfold in just a few hours. Wonpil is barred from leaving his room and he complained that it is such an old-school tradition and it should be abolished and he keeps going on and on.

 

Jae, securing the chance to escape—quickly make his way to out and goes to the first place his feet bring him.

 

He is wearing a crisp, navy suit with a matching vest and pants. Jae smoothens his suit as he sits on the first-row chair, taking a deep breath of the air as he closes his eyes. He could hear the sounds of the crashing waves, the singing of the gulls, the soft music carried by the wind and then, he feels someone’s presence, sitting beside him.

 

Jae opens his eyes, tilting his head in a way so that he could see the intruder—a dark brown pair of eyes welcoming him, smiling as he looks at him fondly. Jae could feel his mouth curves into a smile. Instinctively he palms Brian's right cheek, rubbing it using his thumb.

 

"Hey, stranger," his voice soft as he watches Brian's eyes forming a crescent. Brian places his hand on top of Jae’s—the one that is on his cheek. He rubs it lightly. Still smiling, Jae asks, "why are you here?"

 

Brian brings their hands together in his lap, still holding Jae's hand in his. Jae glances at their intertwining hands before sending Brian a curious gaze. Brian just smiles at him, staring at him, not blinking like he is afraid that he will disappear from him if he takes his eyes off Jae.

 

"Brian?" Jae says his name, voice low and careful.

 

"I—" Brian bits his lower lips, taking a deep breath. In his mind the warning sound goes off, blaring through his head. He feels dizzy. He does not want to say it now, but seeing Jae, alone, and just sitting there. He looks so ethereally serene and everything around him is making his heartache. It is so painful that he wants to let everything out, to just pull Jae into his arms—to make him his again.

 

Jae arches his eyebrow, he too, is anxious as he waits for Brian to speak.

 

"I—" "Brian!"

 

Both of them turn their head. It is so fast that Jae is surprised that they do not sustain from a whiplash. They see Dowoon, from the window, both of his arms and hands waving widely. "Yo Bri, we need you now," he shouts at Brian loudly before spotting Jae, "oh hey, Jae! Wonpil is also looking for you!"

 

Brian feels like killing that kid, but he also knows that he likes him too much that he will soon forget about the displeasure he has right now at the younger for interrupting him. He lets out a big sigh. He looks at Jae and quickly mutters a sorry. His head hangs low like a guilty puppy.

 

Jae couldn't help but smile at the sight. He squeezes their still intertwines hands, making Brian look up. He laughs—the sound is music to Brian's ears. "We should go. Our groom needs their best man," Jae rubs a circle on his hand—the action is soothing, Brain beams. He doesn’t want to let him go. Brian realises that his annoyance is visible on his face as Jae chuckles again. "Bri, we will talk—after the wedding," Jae's voice soft, and it is laced with a promise. Brian nods, before both of them stand up, still not letting go of each other's hand.

 

"Brian Kang, stop flirting and hurry up," Dowoon yells and Brian is very sure every eye on the garden is now on them. He shoots Dowoon a sharp, killing stare before yelling back at him ("Shut up!" he says). He looks back at the man in front of him, who is laughing lightly.

 

"I'll see you?"

 

Jae smiles and nods at him before he slowly backs away, his eyes are still on Brian. Their gazes stay, dawdles on the other. Brian reluctantly loosens his hold on Jae, slowly, having their hands lingers for as long as they could, imprinting the warmth on their skin.

 

It feels short, Brian groans as he watches Jae gives him one last smile—a teasing one—before his silhouette disappears into the building.

 

"Brian!" another call from that annoying Dowoon, Brian sighs before he walks to the opposite direction from Jae.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Brian stands beside Sungjin's, joining in the fun as the rest of their friends in teasing the groom. Dowoon, Jaebum, Sandeul, and Junhyeok keep making remarks about the post-wedding bliss, trying to scare him. ("You going to lose your hair," Sandeul wiggles his brows. "Honeymoon period will only last for the first six months," Jaebum says laughingly. "I can marry Wonpil in your place if you're scared," Dowoon teases, as a result, he got a punch on his gut from yours truly, Sungjin.)

 

"Guys, enough. He's going to run away with Wonpil if you continue on," Brian pulls the poor groom from their friends, putting a halt at whatever they're going to egg on the poor groom.

 

"As if you aren't as bad as them, Brian," Sungjin's rolls his eyes, as Brian fixing Sungjin's tux, smoothing the lines of his tux.

 

"Take it as my wedding present for you," he laughs.

 

"That's bull."

 

Brian laughs again before pursuing his lips, thinking to work out his thoughts. He smiles. "I mean it, I really appreciate you for not interfering—" Sungjin cocks his eyebrow making him laughs. "—Okay, I know that's so not your character. I meant like, you know, let me and Jae handles our own stuff. It is thanks to you and Wonpil that I got to meet Jae again. I got the chance to rekindle of whatever that got in store for us," Brian pauses, sending a look of gratitude at him, his eyes sincere. "I'm really grateful for that, because if not for you two, I don't think I'll be seeing him again or talk to him I guess," Brian smile sheepishly because he knows that if he had the courage, he wouldn't have to wait for four years to see him again. "So, thank you so much Sungjin. I'm forever thankful to you. Both of you."

 

Sungjin stares at his best friend. Usually, Brian is the most reliable, the brave and smart one—he can adapt to almost everything, and he always has a solution for every problem. Sungjin knows that he could count on Brian if anything happens. But, Brian also, he is very secretive and stubborn—he always thinks that he doesn't want to trouble others with his shits. That’s why he prefers to stay mum about his problems. Sungjin's hated that side from Brian, but he will never push Brian out of his comfort zone. He will wait for him until he is ready. Maybe, that's why they manage to stay as friends for so long. He smiles. It is always surprising to see this rare side from him. He pats Brian's right shoulder lightly. "Go get him."

 

Both of them break into a huge grin on their face. Their moment is interrupted when the attendant told them to get ready, as they're ready to start. Sungjin taps Brian upper arms thrice, before walking to his spot. Brian shakes his head lightly before going to his spot behind Sungjin.

 

"You have the ring with you, right?" Brian snorts as Sungjin asks him for the gazillion time today. He replies with a yes, as he didn't have the energy left to tease the nervous groom any further. Brian watches his best friend, and he could see the smile, the anxiety but mostly, he could he see the love in his eyes as the door opens.

 

Brian looks at the direction of the open door as Jae walks out from the building, looking beautiful as he remembers. His hair glints under the sunny sun, his eyes and smile look soft, looking at the crowd before his sights settle on him for long seconds. He didn't even realise that Sungjin had walked forward to take Wonpil from his father. His eyes and mind are locked on Jae. He blushes as he realised where he is right now—or what is his supposed-to-be role now.

 

"If everyone’s ready we will begin the ceremony."

 

<<<>>> 

 

Jae could see the spark in Wonpil's eyes as he made contact with Sungjin's own—both of their expressions mirroring each other—soft, fond and full of love and adoration. He is happy for him, and for Sungjin, Jae smiles as both of them begins to say their vow for each other. Their eyes not leaving each other, smiling and Jae know that Wonpil's in good hands. He could trust Sungjin to take good care of his precious friend.

 

"Brian, ring," Sungjin's voice brings him back to attention, as Sungjin asks his best man for the crucial item. Jae remembers the item tucked safely in his suits and he quickly hands Wonpil for his ring. Then, Jae watches over Wonpil’s shoulder, seeing that Brian is also caught up in his own thoughts. He flabbergasts as he searches for the ring. As Brian hands the ring to Sungjin, their eyes catch each other and Jae couldn't help but draws a smile on his face.

 

It's like there's no one else in that garden but them. Brian is smiling back at him and that is all that matters. Everyone disappears and they're here, standing in front of one another and Jae could feel—he knows that he wants Brian back in his life—so, so much.

 

"You may kiss the groom," the minister announces, bringing Jae back to reality. The guests cheer and clap their hands as Sungjin leans towards Wonpil, his smile gets bigger if it is even possible as he closes the distance between them. Jae claps his hands, watching the new couple having their first kiss as a married couple. Jae says "congratulations," but it gets drowns in the midst of cheers and congratulations from everyone in the room.

 

As the new Mr. and Mr. Park-Kim starts to walk, Jae is soon faced with Brian, as Brian softly smiles at him and his hand extends out for Jae to take. Jae realises that he had to march out with Brian by his side, following behind the couple. Jae takes one step at a time, closer as he takes a deep breath, everything is a kaleidoscope of feeling as he takes Brian's hand in his.

 

"Hey," Brian says softly, eyes meeting his as Brian fix Jae's hand through his arm. Jae chuckles at the whole things. It feels like they are the one who just got married. They’re the one who is marching down the aisle, taking their first walk as a married couple.

 

"This is weird," Jae says as they start walking, "I feel like we're the one who got married."

 

Brian laughs as he heard Jae, his free hand pats on Jae's hand that is on his arm. "Do you want to?" Brian asks his voice low. Jae turns his head to look at him, shocked.

 

"Brian?" he says, low, unsure—afraid to get his hopes up. Brian only looks back at him, and smile before looking back ahead and they march out from the garden in silent. Question unanswered.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Jae walks into the ballroom as eyes searching for familiar faces. His eyes search around and he is hoping to catch familiar looking fox eyes. What he doesn't expect is a tap on his shoulder that got him jumps a little before finding out the intruder’s identity.

 

"Jaebum!" he exclaims, gasping as he pulls the man into a hug. "I was hoping to catch you earlier before the wedding starts," he says as he releases the man, smiling while maintaining a good distance between them to be comfortable to look at each other.

 

"You know, I'm very popular. You need an appointment to meet this," Jaebum points to his whole body, smirking causing Jae to snort as he playfully hit him on his arm.

 

"Where are the others?" Jae asks, eyes looking over Jaebum's shoulder.

 

"You mean Brian?" he grins, teasingly at Jae. Jae rolls his eyes, trying to be annoyed but the smile on his face tells otherwise.

 

"Don't be an ass," they laugh as they walk towards their table, Jae taking a seat on his left. "We're friends now."

 

"Jae," Jaebum voice sounds serious suddenly, and Jae looks at him and he knows him well enough to know what he is going to say. Or what is he going to ask.

 

"I don't know, JB. What I know is that I still like him," Jae sighs, as he confesses to Jaebum. Jaebum nods at him, thinking about the things Jae told him and the things that Brian went through after the two broke up. He could imagine Jae going through the same thing as Brian. But then, the two of them had been stupid and prideful as hell not to admit their own mistakes.

 

"Jae—" Jae turns to look at him, studying his expression as Jaebum carefully articulate his thoughts. "I really hope you guys will last forever. You both are each other happiness."

 

"Thanks, man." Jae smiles at him, soft and meaningful.

 

<<<>>> 

 

Brian walks up the stage and towards the microphone’s stand. He looks at the sea of people in front of him—the lovely couple whom they're celebrating for right now, his friends and then Jae. He knew what he wants to say, what he will say right now—the speech that he had written over and over again—will change whatever he has with Jae now. He takes a deep breath as he speaks into the device, gathering everyone's attention.

 

"Hi, I'm Brian who had been given the role of our groom best man today. Also, I'm Sungjin's best friend who had been by his side far longer than Wonpil—" the whole room laugh.

 

"And I'm also a man who loves someone dearly so, very much and also someone who had been stupid enough to let him go." Brian sadly smiles as his eyes meet Jae's. He laughs before continuing, easing the tense atmosphere.

 

"I'm not here to dampen the mood, but I'm here to celebrate our two couple, our best friend who had found love from another. It's a great joy to found someone that you can share your life with—the laughter, the happiness, the sadness and everything that is in your life with another person. And you know that that person cares for you, loves you and you're his whole world. It’s a great blessing that someone could obtain. Sometimes we realised everything too late, and without we noticed we had lost them—the blessing that we should have held on to dearly. And then we become afraid to chase for it back, leaving everything to fate, hoping that one day we'll get a second chance," Brian breathes in.

 

"I'm glad that Sungjin manages to have his sense intact and not going to need for a second chance,” he chuckles, “and today here we are, celebrating the matrimony between Sungjin and Wonpil," he laughs, as he raises his glass.

 

"I wish for Sungjin and Wonpil all the happiness in this world. May you'll always found each other no matter how lost you'll get. Cheers to Sungjin and Wonpil. Congratulation for your marriage," he says as the rest of the room follows, raising his glass and wishing the best for the couple.

 

He walks down the stage and goes back to his table and his seat, besides Jae. Jae looks nervous, Brian notes as he takes his seat. The others on their table congratulating Brian for his speech and Jaebum and Dowoon just look at him inquisitively, knowing the underlying meaning in his speech. Or whom it was directed to.

 

Jae hears his name and now it is his turn to say his speech. He stands up and Brian follows him with his eyes, watching that small but tall person standing in front of the microphone. He gives Jae an encouraging smile as their eyes meet.

 

"Hi hello. I'm Jae, Wonpil's best friend. I actually got a confession to make. I can't even understand my handwriting right now. So bear with me," he chuckles. "Okay, so when I first saw Sungjin is when we met at the restaurant. We were trying the food that we all are eating right now. I saw him, bald and round head, with eyes with a depth in it, looking fondly at my best friend and I knew instantly that I could trust him with Wonpil. Sungjin, I don't really know you that well, but from the time we spend together, I believe that you are a gentle, attentive and kind person, just the kind of person our Piri needs. And also, I knew that you love Wonpil, a whole, a whole lot. Please take good care of him,” he smiles at the couple before continuing.

 

“Wonpil—“Jae coughs. “—I love you, my best friend. The person that I could trust to hold me grounded, and the one that has always been there for me, especially during my worst time. At first, when you announced that you’re going to get married, I was sad. Because I know that I was going to share my best friend with someone else, you’re not my exclusive property anymore, and I was afraid that he would take you away from me. But, I know how happy you're when you're with him. So, I give you my blessings,” he chuckles.

 

“I love you, Wonpil in a sense that I wanted the very best for you and I believe that Sungjin is the one, the most best-est man the world has got to offer. I’m going to quote Laozi, he said that ‘being deeply loved by someone gives you strength while loving someone deeply gives you courage’ and I could see that in them. Everyone, I humbly ask you to stand up and let us give a toast to the happy couple,” he smiles.

 

“May happiness will always found a home in them. To Wonpil and Sungjin.”

 

<<<>>> 

 

Jae walks to the balcony, getting some fresh air in his system. He looks at the caliginous sky, adorns by a myriad of stars, shining brightly by themselves. He thinks about Brian—his speech, and the way his eyes looked at him. Is it possible that they’re still harbouring the same feelings for each other?

 

Jae sighs loudly.

 

He doesn’t want to put his hopes up or even repeat the same mistake they did in the past. He knows that if that happens again, he would not survive it. Brian means so much to him that he rather not have him in his life again, rather than live with the guilt of disappointing Brian again. He can’t have that.

 

But, deep inside, Jae tries hard to bury it deep—he wants Brian. Jae can’t help but let the old feelings resurface, or—he smiles sadly—his feelings for Brian had never sunk in the first place.

 

Jae didn’t realise the other presence that had slipped into the balcony and goes to stand beside him. Jae turns to look at the eyes that he loves so much—Brian.

 

“Hey,” he greets him, voice soft. They are standing so close that their shoulders are touching and Jae could smell the bergamot and sandalwood.

 

“Hey,” Jae smiles. Both of them just stare at each other, the time froze as Jae commits Brian in his memory. He has so much to ask him, to tell him but everything seems to disappear as once he sees Brian.

 

“Jae,” Brian calls for him, and Jae could see that he is nervous. Jae gulps as he waits with bated breath. “I think, that—“ Brian took a deep breath. “—tell me if I’m wrong, but Jae—“ he holds both of Jae’s hand, pulling him closer. “—I’m still in love with you and I think that you do too.”

 

Jae looks at him, eyes locked. He couldn’t believe that this is happening. Brian is here and confessing to him, again. He thinks back to the first time Brian confess to him—he was the first one to confess and here they are, again, and Brian is still the first one to confess to him. Jae just looks at him, unable to mutter any words, any coherency has left his brain.

 

“Jae, say something,” Brian pleads, his voice sounds afraid, like he was regretting his action—his hold on Jae’s hand loosen. Jae just looks at him before something clicks in his head.

 

Oh.

 

Jae did the first thing that comes to his mind. He closes the distance between them, as he grabs the lapels of Brian’s coat and pulling him closer to him. Closing his eyes, Jae takes the courage to kiss Brian first and then, he feels the rough but soft lips on his. Memories flood his mind, memories of their kisses—of how it still feels familiar but so different. How it still feels so right and fits.

 

Everything moves slowly for them, and Jae couldn't feel anything else but Brian. The way Brian’s arms circles his body, trapping him, imprison him in his embrace. The kiss becomes something more, every inch of feelings that were buried now are now let open, their longing for each other, their wants and desire. Months of tension are let loose and the only thing that matters is how right everything is now.

 

Jae loves him, still and always.

 

"Do you want to get out from here?"

 

Jae laughs and nods. "Thought you'll never ask."

 

Brian smiles widely, as he holds Jae's hand in his, walking away from the place and going somewhere that there will be only the two of them. No more interruptions.

 

"Just so you know, Piri gonna kills us when he knows," Jae groans as Brian squeezes his hand in assurance, indirectly telling him that he will be there for him.

 

"I know," he shrugs when Jae arches his eyebrow curiously. "Sungjin told me," Brian chuckles. "He also told me that he will try to save our asses."

 

Jae laughs and Brian thinks it is the most beautiful sound he had ever heard. Brian leans closer to his side, his lips hovering at the tip of Jae's ear.

 

"I love you, Park Jaehyung," he whispers, smiling. Jae pulls away and turns his head to look at him, so beautiful and his. A smile is drawn on his face.

 

"I love you, Kang Younghyun," he says as they come closer for a kiss again. This time, it is sweet and short and full of joy. Their eyes smile at each other, and Brian leans in for another kiss, lingering for a few more moments.

 

Everything is just fine. Jae smiles into the kiss.

 

<<<>>> 

 

"How was your honeymoon?" Jae asks, eyeing Wonpil from the rim of his mug as he slowly sips his coffee. Jae groans as he sees the latter arching his brow and smile that teasing and the 'do you want to know all of the details' kind of smile. "You know what, forget that I asked."

 

Wonpil laughs before sipping his coffee. They are sitting in Wonpil and Sungjin's apartment, as Wonpil is alone considering he is still on leave and Sungjin don't. So he calls Jae over so that they could catch up. He isn't blind as he could see the tension between his best friend and Sungjin's best friend. There is something going on between them, Wonpil smirks. He had pushed away his intentions on meddling on the two just because he was swamped with the whole wedding affairs. And now, he is back so he is hell-bent on getting the two together—if they're still not together by now. "So—" he drawls, carefully he watches Jae as the man puts his mug on the table, focusing his attention on Wonpil. "—how is Brian doing?"

 

For a while, they just stare at one another and Wonpil, being his best friend for years knows when Jae is hiding something from him and right now, he is having difficulty on wording his thoughts out. Wonpil arches his brow inquisitively as he heard Jae sighs heavily. "Piri, first, promise me you won't kill Brian for the thing I'm about to tell you. I was the one who suggested it," Jae looks at him in the eye, serious. And he doesn't intend on continuing if Wonpil does not give his word.

 

"Fine," He says after a while, groaning because he knew whatever that Jae going to say is going to make him pissed.

 

"Okay, so—" Jae take a deep breath. "Brian and I—we used to date before."

 

"What?" Wonpil yells. "Jae, you didn't even tell me about Brian!"

 

"Technically, I did."

 

"When?"

 

"I did mention this hot B.A. student that makes me hot all over. Remember?"

 

"That doesn't count," Wonpil snorts.

 

"But—"

 

"Did I ever ambiguously tell you about Sungjin?"

 

"Excuse me. You just mention to me that you're going to marry him. Not dating him," Jae rolls his eyes, watching Wonpil narrowing his eyes at him.

 

"Okay, fine. I guess we're even now. You're together now, right?" he says after a while. Wonpil takes a sip of his coffee.

 

"I guess we do," Jae smiles. Wonpil sighs, before leaning closer to Jae. His expression brightens before asking him.

 

"So, it was during my wedding right?" He wiggles his eyebrows.

 

Jae chuckles before nodding at him. "Thanks for that anyway. We would never get back together if it weren't for you and Sungjin,"

 

"You know Jae, I read a quote somewhere, can't exactly remember who wrote it but they said that love is the silent saying and saying of a single name,” Wonpil smiles at him, “I guess that's you and Brian huh?"

 

Jae smiles fondly. "I guess so."

 

"You guys found a way back to each other. That's so romantic."

 

"Shut up."

 

"I guess Brian showers you with love poem and love song lyrics all day long. If what Sungjin told me stand corrected."

 

Jae smiles, remembering the text he received today. Brian had sent him a text from Sonnet 43. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. "I guess so."

 

Wonpil just observed his best friend, happy to know that he also found his happiness along the journey. "I'm so happy for you, tall bean."

 

Jae laughs hearing the nickname from childhood. "Thanks, Pencil."

 

<<<>>> 

 

Jae settles in Brian's arms after the latter complained about the lack of warmth in the room. Knowing that his boyfriend is being unreasonable (the room has a heater for god sake), Jae sighs and bent to whatever that Brian wants. ("You're lucky you're cute," Jae pinch the bridge of his nose as Brian only smile at him, satisfied to have Jae in his embrace.)

 

They are watching some Marvel's movie that Jae can't seem to remember the title. It is because Brian wants to watch it and Jae is too whipped for that man to deny his request (maybe the puppy eyes and the kisses managed to make Jae gives in. Maybe).

 

Jae looks at their linked hand, holding it up so he can observe better. Brian kisses him on the cheek before returning his attention to the movie. It was the Jae sighs, as he does not know how many times they have watched this movie.

 

"I met Piri today."

 

Brian hums, still not paying any attention to him. Jae sighs, as he leans into Brian's chest. Brian instinctively tightens his hold, enjoying the fit. Jae didn't realise when he falls asleep and the next thing he knows the movie is about to end. Jae stirs and nuzzles his face to Brian's neck. "Sorry," he murmurs.

 

Brian kisses his temple and runs his hand up and down Jae's arm. Jae focuses his attention back on the movie, enjoying the moment. As the movie rolls its credit, he feels Brian turning him to face him. "Hey," he smiles.

 

Jae yawns before smiling that lazy smile, eyes heavy. "Hey, you."

 

"Sleepy?" Brian asks, smiling at the sight of sleepy Jae. He plays with Jae's hair, stroking, running his hand through it lightly—with an occasional kiss on the temple.

 

"Hmmm—" Jae stretches his body, feeling lighter as Brian continues pampering him. He snuggles into him, inhaling his scent. "I am—but I want to talk to you."

 

Brian inquisitive eyebrow raises, and he props his arms on the back of the sofa. "Sounds serious."

 

Jae laughs as he leans into Brian's touch. "It's nothing, I met Piri today."

 

"Sungjin told me. He was pissed that the hospital calls him as soon they landed," Brian laughs remembering the frustration in his best friend voice when he called him earlier. He rests his head on Jae's, hands still stroking Jae's hair. "What's wrong?"

 

"It just—something Piri said and it got me thinking."

 

"What's it?"

 

Jae smile and he could feel that Brian is smiling as well. Jae takes Brian's free hand and holds it in his, playing with his fingers. "We found each other and then broke up. And by chance, our best friend got married to each other, and we found each other again."

 

Brian hums.

 

"Piri said something about a quote he read," Jae pauses, turning to look at Brian, his eyes.  He purses his lips, thinking about the best way to articulate it, taking his sweet time.

 

"Jae, I'm about to doze off," Brian teases, which got Jae rolling his eyes.

 

"I'm trying to be romantic here!" Jae groans before they broke into laughter. As the laughter dissipates, Jae stares at him again—fond and full of love.

 

"I will only call out for your name—no matter how far apart we could be," he pauses, “because I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where."

 

Brian just stares at him, frozen from the sudden declaration. He watches Jae, him looking so beautiful under the low lights, the light shining on the blond of his hair making a halo, the gold rim of his glasses glints and his eyes, soft and small. Brian takes a deep breath before smiling, collecting back his composure.

 

"Have you been reading Neruda again?" Brian grins teasingly. Trying to ease the tension between them and it seems like to works when Jae is trying to escape from him.

 

"You're impossible," Jae groans. "Why do I even fall for you?"

 

Brian grins, before he touches his lips lightly on Jae's, hovering there—catching Jae off guard.

 

“Let me kiss you,” leaning forward, Brian whispers in his ear. In an almost imperceptible manner, Jae nods. Brian grins as his arms go to Jae's waist before his lips linger—from Jae's ear to his cheek, to his chin before reaching to his designated destination—Jae's lips, plump and soft. The kiss starts chastely, innocent as they are testing the waters.

 

Jae gaps in surprise, as Brian pulls him closer, his fingers brush on the exposed skin of his waist. Brian takes that opportunity to deepen the kiss. Brian tastes every place that he could reach as he continues to explore the territory that he knows so well—that it is his—gently.

 

His mind starts to get lost on the pleasant sensation that the kiss is evoking in him. Jae’s arms slowly go up to touch Brian’s face and he pulls him closer to him.

 

The kiss lasted for so long until the need for air is unbearable. Jae pulls away, eyelids heavy and their forehead touching. Jae blinks copiously, dazes as his breath labours from the kiss. His arms are still around Brian’s neck. It had been a while since they kiss this passionately. He needs a moment to find his bearing.

 

"Jae," Jae looks to meet Brian's eyes, his pupils dilated, dark and dangerous—full of desire. "I love thee to the depth and breadth and height. My soul can reach when feeling out of sight. For the ends of being and ideal grace," Jae chokes, as he hears Brian quoting the sonnet he had sent to him earlier today. His eyes full of love and Jae can't help but go in for another kiss. A light kiss, but filled with his adoration for the man.

 

"Thank you for finding your way back," Jae says with their forehead touching, eyes closed.

 

"Thank you for accepting me back."

 

They smile at each other and know that, no matter what happens, they will always find their way back home.

 

 

<<<end>>>

**Author's Note:**

> thanks for reading it (again--for those who had read it before). i hope you'd like it. leave some comments and kudos. i would love to read your thoughts on this <3


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